Go To Hell
by Raven-2010
Summary: For 3 days Kikyo tries to kill Kag, Sessh catches her at it & tells Inu, Kag sets a trap gives her a big surprise & gets revenge, Sessh helps Inu & Kag, Inu and Miroku have a sick prank war, updated extended, comedy romance tricks LEMONS Inu/Kag


**Disclaimer I don't own from Inuyasha Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ media do Rated R**

LOL special thanks to readers and reviewers, updated extended April 2011, Inu/Kag

**Go To Hell**

**By Raven 2010 Nov 8 2010**

**Day 1** **the arrow **

Kagome went for a walk to relax and clear her head she sat down on a rock under her favorite tree with her back against it's trunk and her eyes closed. Just as she was completely relaxed. she heard something wiz past her and felt it graze right her forearm

Her eyes snapped open she looked at the tree and saw an arrow embedded in it she knew that it was a sacred arrow, even though it's energy was tainted as could be seen by the what was pink was now gray energy surrounding it. Kagome then quickly looked in front her and saw Kikyo standing there ready to shoot another arrow

"Hey Kinkyho? Kagome said knowing it would piss her off "I'd call you horse face but that would be an insult to a beautiful animal" so what's say we just use Kikyshit?

"Kikyo my name is Ki-ky-o, Pissgome"

"Yeah what ever Kikybo, better to be piss then shit" hah Kikystink"

"Bitch" Kikyo growled in frustration

"We know you are" Will you stop announcing it already?

"I will watch you die, and that's a promise" Kikyo yelled

"So were you trying to kill me, or the poor tree? it never did anything to you tree killer" knowing that Kikyo had been aiming at her.

"Whore" Kikyo snapped

"Ooooo speaking from experience are we sweetie? You know you shouldn't run around telling everyone about yourself like that it really is very unseemly, and disgusting" Kagome joked

"I'll kill you" Kikyo screamed

"I'll kill you" Kagome mocked in a whiny voice "Why don't you shut up and go blow Naraku, at least then your mouth would be doing something constructive for the first time in your life"

"You little bitch you will die"

"Yeah whatever now back to the subject at hand you know Kikyskank your aim is really off" ooooo is it that time of the month dear? Oh sorry forgot clay poppets don't have that or babies either, you know I thought you sucking Naraku's dick like ya do would give you perfect aim" aw did he slip and squirt you in the eye blurring your vision last night honey? Kagome taunted in a sickening sweet voice

"What? why you little piece of shit" How dare you? Kikyo screamed

"You shouldn't talk about yourself like that Kikyho" haven't you ever heard the old saying love thyself? Maybe if you used your finger and loved yourself often you wouldn't be such a bitch" Kagome said then laughed

Kikyo was so enraged that with her hate filled grip on it she broke the second arrow she was about to shoot at Kagome, tripped on a tree root and landed face down in a pile of pig shit lifted her head up looked up at Kagome then said

"Go run and cry to Inuyasha" who do you think he'll believe? it wont be you I'll be seeing you bitch" Kikyo screamed rage and humiliation clearly written across her face

"Well then let me give you a parting gift" Kagome said

"What gift? You have nothing to give me, and you have nothing I want tramp" Kikyo bit out

"This" Kagome said then swiftly sunk the tip of one of Kikyo's own arrows into the cheek of her ass "Happy birthday even though it's not hehehe"

"Ahhhhhhhhh" Kikyo screamed

Constipation it's a real bitch isn't it? Hm you've got it bad I can tell by that scream, now remember don't push to hard or your ass you will bleed, ya shouldn't be plugged up as much as Naraku uses your back door" Kagome taunted

"I don't do that" Kikyo snapped

"It's just us girls here and I don't judge" Kagome needled Kikyo turned and limped off

Kagome returned to camp and never said a word to the others except Sango when they were alone. Sango loved the part with Kikyo falling in the pig shit and the arrow in her butt cheek then laughed, Sango wanted to go find beat and kill the bitch

Kagome said "No I already have a plan"

"Yesss? "do tell Kags"

Kagome told Sango "Since she's tried to kill me without reason which priestesses aren't supposed to do, she broke a sacred law and now I can do what I'm gonna do"

Kagome told Sango her plan and an evil grin crossed Sango's lips "Kagome your twisted and it's evil that's why you're my best friend" Sango praised

**Day 2 Kagome strikes back **

Kagome went to the hot spring to bathe she stripped put her clothes on a nearby rock got in the water put her back against the rocks and relaxed, after awhile she heard a twig snap she didn't sense any Youkai and it wasn't Sango or Inuyasha. She and thought to herself oh "Here we go again"

Sure enough Kikyo slowly snuck up behind Kagome with a rope in her hands and was about to strangle Kagome, when Kagome suddenly turned around grabbed the rope with one hand and with the other hand punched Kikyo in the throat causing her to choke. A move that Sango had taught her to use on overly aggressive attackers

"Awww poor baby got a cold? Kagome taunted "Did Naraku make you sleep out doors again like the dog you are"

"Cough, cough you will cough rot in hell" Kikyo choked out

"Promises, promises, promises" Kagome wise cracked "You always promise but never deliver, sniff, sniff gee I feel so cheated" she ragged feigning tears

"I haaate you" Kikyo bellowed

"I love you to angel hehehe" Kagome said then laughed

"Why were you ever born, you serve no useful purpose?"

"Because unlike with you kami wanted heheh" Kagome said with a smile then laughed

Whiny wench" Kikyo spat "I don't see what Inuyasha sees in you"

"Maybe he likes live a warm body, instead of cold dead clay bitches"

"I'll be back you dirty little tramp this is not over yet" Kikyo promised then took off

"Don't let the door to hell hit ya where mother nature split ya" damn what's a bitch gotta do to have a bath in peace around here? Kagome wise cracked under her breath smiling evilly

**Day 3 The dagger, snipe fest, and a surprise gift **

Kikyo saw Kagome picking wild herbs in the woods and out of her own greed and arrogance lost control of her usually calm cool self control, she blindly rushed at Kagome with a dagger trying to stab her through the heart. Only Kagome spun around and kicked Kikyo in the stomach knocking her into a tree

Don't break the tree Kikypig, as much I love our little visits I'm really bored" cant you come up with something fun to do? Every day it's the same shit I'm gonna kill Kagome. Oh and Kikho this is strike 3" Kagome said

"What do you mean by that, you cheap weak ugly copy of me?" Your nothing but a useless reincarnation" Kikyo snapped

"Cant tell ya it's a surprise" Kagome ragged "And I do not believe in reincarnation"

"What do you really think I fear you?

"Honey when I want you to fear me trust me you will" Kagome wise cracked "Oh and for the record I'm not afraid of you either, your to boring to scare me"

"Your not even a real priestess" Kikyo taunted

"Well I have something youuu don't" Kagome teased

"Oh and what might that be? Kikyo barked

"A live warm body and Inuyasha and, oooo what he can do with his hands absolutely makes my body sing"

"You lie you will never have him I will see to it"

"Ahhh kikyho so blind so dumb" Kagome gave her an evil grin picked her herbs up and turned to leave

"Bitch I'll tell Inuyasha you tried to kill me then he'll make you leave Kikyo" spat out

"Like I give a freakin rats farting ass hurry the fuck up" what are you waiting for? I dare you to" what's the hold up? What you suddenly can't walk to much back door action with Naraku hah? Kagome said to rile her

"Inuyasha loves me he will never love you" Kikyo spat

Kagome thought before the final round starts "Let me have some fun with this arrogant self righteous wench" Kagome said nothing and gave Kikyo the finger

"I am correct you are an ignorant stupid child and have no manners"

"You know Kikyass all you had to do was wish on the jewel for your life but you chose death, it's sooo sad if you only knew what you are missing. Inuyasha is really hung and long I mean inhumanly huge and he has to be the fuck of the century. Oh god's and what does with his tongue, then screwed me so good I am lucky I can walk we do it every day in fact this morning he did me till I couldn't come any more"

"You lie he'd never" Kikyo said in shock "Kami how I hate you"

"Yeah he did over and over again and moaned my name in ecstasy, then told me that he never loved any woman like he loves me"

"Filthy lying bitch" Kikyo snapped

"Hmm that reminds me Inuyasha is gonna wanna fuck again, he always wants some before lunch, so I cant waste precious time with you"

"You will die long slow and painfully I promise and you will beg me for death for release from it" Kikyo threatened

"Well you know Kikytart if you get hot I don't know if you clay wenches can you can always do it with Naraku. He loves to create clay poppet's so much maybe he'd love to throw you a pity fuck" Kagome taunted

"I do nothing with Naraku slut" Kikyo said trying to antagonize Kagome

"Kiky baby don't worry it's our little secret, I unlike you I have honor I won't tell anyone I promise, I even keep my promises to bitches" Kagome replied sadistically grinning

Later that day after the evening meal Kagome patiently waited she knew they would show up sooner or later. Kagome spotted Kikyo's soul collectors which always meant she was calling Inuyasha but before he saw them she went over to Inuyasha

"Inuyasha? Kagome called

"Yeah?

"Will you go for a walk with me?

"Sure Kagome"

Inuyasha and Kagome were walking through the woods Kagome saw Kikyo coming but Inuyasha didn't, Kagome quickly grabbed Inuyasha and pulled him to her startling the poor Hanyou

"I love you" Kagome said

Then kissed him deep that thrilled him. He wanted to gasp when he felt her tongue enter his mouth, then felt a head rush from the excited feeling rushing throughout his body, he felt a fire starting to burn within, passion, love , deep desire and yes lust consumed him until his mind drifted away from all else, it was as if everything else had never existed and there was only Kagome

Seeing he scene before her "Nooo Inuyasha you traitor, you betrayed me again" Kikyo screamed

That snapped Inuyasha out of his daze, Kagome had a surprise for Kikyo she threw a pair of subujaction beads like Inuyasha wears around Kikyo's neck and said "Go to hell"

"Nooooo you can't, stop her Inuyasha hurry kill the bitch now" Kikyo screamed showing her true evil nature

The ground cracked fast and began to open up, Kikyo looked at Inuyasha and said "Help"

"Fuck you Kikyo" was his reply

_**Sesshoumaru**_

Sesshoumaru entered and oh he was beyond pissed, silence wench I told Inuyasha all the shit I saw you do to Kagome, but I didn't interfere because Kagome wanted it that way and I would have stopped you if it had gone to far" Sesshoumaru yelled in fury

"You thought Sesshoumaru and I were still fighting and that is just what I wanted you to believe, we made peace long ago. I played dumb but I knew everything you did all this time, I'm sorry I ever knew or loved you in the first place I wish the hell I never had" Inuyasha in formed her

"Inuyasha I'm sorry we can still be together" Kikyo said in a fake remorseful tone

"Not happening she devil, thanks Sesshoumaru"

"Any time little brother"

Inuyasha grabbed Kagome then kissed her hard long and passionately, that was the last thing Kikyo saw while she was sucked into hell and never returned., Sesshoumaru who was standing there beside a tree and watching said

"It's about freakin time little brother" Sesshoumaru said grinning devilishly

"Kagome?

"Yes Sesshoumaru?

"Welcome to the family"

"Thank you"

"Little brother I trust you know what you need to do next? Sesshoumaru teased, Inuyasha looked at Sesshoumaru and grinned

Inuyasha picked Kagome up and ran off "Inuyasha where are we going?

"You'll see my little wench" he answered, he stopped near a cave that had a hot spring inside it and took her in., by her scent he knew and teasingly said "Awww Gome my sweet minx you are in heat"

"What? Damn that canine nose of yours" Kagome responded

"That's one of the best benefits of being a dog" he teased "I'll show you the big one next" he said with a lecherous smile that would make Miroku proud "Don't worry my hot little wench I've got the cure for that"

"I bet you do my horny little letch" she teased

"Who me? Yes I know I'm horny" but what's a letch? I don't know what that is" he said feigning ignorance "Gome you wound me" he teased

"Yeah right mister horny canine" Kagome teased

"Woof, woof" he said "I am just an innocent dog"

Inuyasha started kissing her and gently pushed the tip of his tongue between her lips asking for entrance, she immediately opened up for him. He grabbed her ass pulling her to him while rubbing himself against her sending her senses reeling and lust into overdrive

"Oh Gods Inuyasha" she moaned

Kagome kissed him gently nibbled on and nipped his neck then ran the tip of her tongue along the edges of his sensitive ears Inuyasha groaned and became fevered 'Shit Kagome your driving me crazy I can't take much more"

"Not to worry my sexy handsome Hanyou I am going to devour you" Kagome said then had him out of his clothes faster then he could blink

"Holy shit wench" shocked Inuyasha said

"Oh yeah my hot pretty little minx two can play that game" So he did the same to her

"Ooooo do you promise" she teased

**Scream my name Inuyasha**

**Lemons start**

Kagome pushed him down "Inuyasha I'm going to make you scream my name"

Kagome mounted him then gently nipped at his neck while rocking back and forth on his manhood, half insane with love and lust he arched his back and ground against her seeking relief

"Good god's woman he panted out please Kagome?

"Please what? tell me what you want Yasha?

"It aches let me inside you and ride me, I wanna watch you while you do it"

Kagome positioned herself above him and slid down impaling herself on his long thick shaft oh my

"Ooooo" both exclaimed from the first time intimate feel of one another

"God's Gome it feels even better then I imagined it would" are you all right? I know it's your first time"

"I am better then alright Yasha you feel so good I think I am going to lose my mind" she answered

Kagome moved up and down one time and came drenching her soon to be mates length, pride filled him. Inuyasha smiled his heart bursting with pride Kagome moved up and down, Inuyasha's face and cute little ears were taken over by a reddish blush Kagome loved it

"Ohhh oh shit that's it yes ahh hard Gome harder, _**Ka Ka Kagome"**_

"_**Oh gad's Inuyasha" **_

While the two exploded Inuyasha's fangs grew long and Kagome felt them burrow into her pulse point on the left side of her neck, his eyes reddened and his jagged cheek stripes appeared, she immediately became a hanyouesse her eyes also reddened and she had jagged cheek stripes as well, Kagome repeated his actions, forever marking them mates

Then the sex became wild savage hard and animalistic each wildly thrusting and pounding into the other, tongues battled for dominance while their bodies burned with their ever heightening desire for each other, both were insatiable starved for and could not get enough of each other, climax after climax drove them on until both were spent and sated, after it ended they rested for a brief time and regained strength

"Hello my Hanyouess" Inuyasha teased as he looked at his mate

"Greetings mate" she replied "My assassin" she joked

Inuyasha kissed her and before she knew it she was on her back with a feral hard again Hanyou deep inside her heated depths moving with inhuman speed, making her scream his name

"_**Y, yes Inuyashaaa" **_

"This is what I like my Gome scream my name"

"More I cant get enough of you, _**Inuyashaaa" **_he took her in every position there is, the mating continued for the rest of the day

They woke up the following morning "Don't go anywhere mister your not done yet"

"You gonna make me do naughty things again" he replied

"Hell yes"

Her words alone made him so hard he ached, down on all fours Inuyasha stalked toward his little temptress like a hungry wolf closing in on it's prey, playing along Kagome slightly backed away feigning fear

"As you wish Gome" Inuyasha teased licking his lips

Inuyasha mounted Kagome and rubbed his length against her entrance then felt her wetness leaking out coating his hardened length, the scenting of her arousal sent him further into a frenzy mindless lust

"Inuyasha please I want you inside me? he entered her "Oh don't stop yes harder give it to me yes my, _**Inu yash aaa"**_

Hearing his mates pleas took him into mind numbing ecstasy with her _**"Ahhh Gomeee" **_hours passed before they were through

**Lemons end **

A few days later they went back to camp and were greeted with

_**Here comes the bride with the groom at her side a kissing and hugging they had lot's of loving. Now the groom no more will he be grouchy because Kagome cured his ouchy" **_Miroku sang teasingly

"Miroku your dead' Inuyasha told him

"Inuyasha you'd injure a friend?

"No just kill a monk"

"I thought we were friends" Miroku said in a childish voice

"We are that's why I'm gonna pound you"

"Geez, your supposed to be mellow after a night of endless humping" Miroku ragged

"Hey monk here's a rhyme for ya, _**There is a monk who love's to hump when over his thick head he got a thump he swiftly developed a big lump. As if drunk he did sway then lost track of most of the day. His friends searched for him high and low but where he was nobody did know he, disappeared as if off the face of the earth others it will astound but his body never will be found" **_Inuyasha said with a menacing grin

"Eeeeeeek" Miroku screeched

"Tooo late now Wussyroku" Inuyasha wise cracked

"Sic him Inuyasha" Sango said

"Sango how could you? Miroku whined in a childish voice

Miroku ran Inuyasha started to chase him, but Sango tripped Miroku Inuyasha put him in a choke hold and gave Miroku the worlds worst noogie in the middle of his head

"Now boys please play nice and don't kill each other" Kagome and Sango teased

"Gee thanks a lot for nothing" Miroku said broke out of Inuyasha's hold, then took off running

"Miroku get your ass back here and fight like a man" Inuyasha yelled at the retreating monk

"No way you murderous dog"

"I will show you a murderous dog when I get my claws on you" Inuyasha said

neither of them came back for the day

"Well all while the boys are off playing we get a short vacation" Kagome said

**The new girl**

When Inuyasha returned late that night the group saw that he was carrying a strange woman over his shoulder, they waited Inuyasha entered the village. As they watched and asked who she was all Inuyasha did was smile evilly and put her down on the ground then turned her over

'Meet our new traveling companion" Inuyasha said everyone gasped

'Oh no it isn't" it can't be? Sango said

'You've got to be kidding me" Kagome said

'Yes ladies and I kid you not this is Miraka" Inuyasha said

There lay Miroku perfumed gagged wrists and ankles tied up with ropes and dressed in beautiful pink woman's clothes. The others could not hold it in any longer and all simultaneously broke out laughing, and poor Miroku grunted in frustration when Miroku was calmed they untied him

'Are we even now Inuyasha? Miroku asked

'That depends monk" are ya gonna cut the crap and not fuck with me no more?

'Inuyasha I want more then anything to get out of these clothes bathe get back into men's clothing and forget that this ever happened"

'Yeah then were even" Inuyasha replied

**The gift that keeps on giving, and Miroku's gift**

The seemingly sweet kind forgiving monk had a dark plan of his own it was one Inuyasha would always remember. Miroku made his famous meat and vegetable stew that they were all crazy about especially Inuyasha who loved mixing it with his beloved ramen

'Wow thanks Miroku this delicious" Kagome praised

Miroku put an extra ingredient in Inuyasha's food, about a half hour later Inuyasha clutched his stomach he had one hell of a belly ache. As the pain increased his eyes squinted and muscles clinched

,Kagome something's wrong my stomach is killing me" Inuyasha said

,Maybe you ate to much you did have 3 helpings"

"No Gome this isn't the I ate to much pain, it's something else" then his stomach started gurgling "Oh crap" Inuyasha said

"What's wrong Inuyasha? Oh and now were even" Miroku said and held up a well known plant used as a laxative for all to see. Inuyasha's beautiful golden eyes went wide then glared daggers at Miroku

"Oh shit" Kagome and Sango both said when seeing the plant

"Mirokuuuuu you shit head rotten fuck I'm gonna kill you" Inuyasha screamed

'Inuwasha chase and try to catch me now why don't you? Miroku taunted then turned making ready to run

'Miroku you bastard I'm gonna do worse then kill ya I'm gonna rip your fucking dick off" Inuyasha threatened

"Whatcha waiting for? Miroku wise cracked

Inuyasha lunged for miroku and was about to start a chase when suddenly stopped dead in his tracks clamped one hand across his stomach and cried out in pain

"Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, shit I'll get you for this monk, ah crap"

Were Inuyasha's last words before he turned holding his stomach and ran into the forest to start the first of his many relief runs, he had a long busy night to look forward to. Once the shock wore off he others cracked up and nearly laughed themselves to death


End file.
